An Update on Sleep Training and Getting Help

Hello, dear readers!

Today, I want to share an update on my sleep training journey and my recent decision to get help watching my baby while I work. It’s been a challenging and emotional time, but I’m hopeful these changes will lead to better outcomes for both me and my daughter.

Sleep Training Update: Why the Graduated Cry-It-Out Method Didn’t Work

After three days of trying the graduated CIO method, I realized it was 1000% not going to work for us. Each nap time and bedtime seemed to get progressively worse, with my daughter crying more intensely for longer periods. Instead of learning to self-soothe, she seemed to become more distressed, and her sleep patterns worsened, with short sleep periods and more frequent waking.

We only tried this method for three days, but it was enough to see that neither of us was thriving. The lack of sleep took a toll on me, and hearing her cries, even for short intervals, was heartbreaking. I would comfort her after each crying session, but it didn’t seem to help. Her cries kept everyone in the house awake, adding to the stress and exhaustion.

The Emotional Impact

The emotional turmoil was significant. I experience strong mood swings, feeling wonderful for brief moments before crashing into feelings of devastation and worthlessness. Despite these mood swings, I remained extremely goal-oriented, which added to the confusion and distress. I recognized that continuing this method could potentially trigger a manic episode, depressive episode, or mixed episode, which would be particularly dangerous so soon postpartum.

Next Steps in Sleep Training

I’ve learned that slow and steady will win this race. As much as I want my bed back and some alone time with my husband, it’s more important to prioritize my mental health and ensure I can take care of my baby safely. I plan to do more research on gentler sleep training methods that align better with our needs.

Getting Help with Baby Care

In addition to reevaluating our sleep training approach, I’ve also made a significant change to my work routine by getting help with watching my baby. Initially, I had a teen help out once a week, but it wasn’t enough, especially with school starting soon. Now, we have more structured care.

Deciding on the Right Help

We had many back-and-forth discussions about whether to enroll her in a daycare facility, work evenings with the teen’s help, or find a different solution. Ultimately, we went with a structured option with a trusted caregiver who also gives my daughter some socialization.

Goals and Expectations

Starting now, I will have help on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays for about 20-24 hours a week. My primary goal is to complete my work efficiently on the days I have help so that I can give my full attention to my daughter on the days I don’t work. This balance will help me be more present with her while still meeting my professional obligations.

Thank you for following along on our journey. Sleep training and balancing work and motherhood are not easy, but sharing these experiences makes the challenges feel a bit lighter. I’ll keep you updated on our progress!